The title of this blog is a favorite quote from Gretchen Rueben's book, The Happiness Project. I admit, I do catch myself wishing away some days, some seasons of life, hoping for better things. The years pass quickly and when I look back I realize those WERE the better things. In an effort to capture those better things I begin this blog. The details of my life are many things: mundane, quirky, sad, joyful, and hopefully, at times, entertaining. About three years ago my life was pretty much an open book when I blogged about our family's struggle with leukemia. When that was over I closed the book. I now open it again----well, at least a few chapters

Friday, May 20, 2011

If you want to see me, drop in any time. If you want to see my house, make an appointment.

This post is spurred by a facebook status I just read. Apparently, this person's wife's house is always clean and tidy, the laundry is always caught up, meals are always prepared each night, blah, blah, blah, the list went on.

I have always had a love hate relationship with my house. I love it when it is clean and things are under control; I hate it when it's not. I am under the assumption that most of us are like that. The problem is, spotlessly clean and under control doesn't happen very often around here. I long time ago I read a book that  had a line in it that hit me like a lightning bolt. It was: "I am not my house". As women, we are so duped into believing otherwise. We have been indoctrinated with that notion since birth. That statement was so freeing. I could literally feel the shackles of guilt coming loose the more I decided to believe it.

I'm all for a clean house. Don't think that I'm not, or that I am a slob or anything. But let's be real. Everyone has stuff going on and they have to put it somewhere on the priority list. I will honestly admit that my house isn't at the top of the priority list. It may shock you that it is not even near the top. As a very busy single mom the top spots are reserved for kids, sleep, work, extra-curricular, church commitments, and exercise. If I had an abundance of free time, of course my house would be perfect, but free time is not one the the blessings I have right now.

A wise friend told me recently that it won't always be like this. I hope she is right. One day I hope to not step on a piece of lego once a day, not see my daughter's room scattered with craft supplies, not see a child running through the house with muddy feet and a loaded water gun in hand. Who am I kidding? Of course I am going to miss this stuff. In fact, it will be the stuff I will probably miss the most when they are gone.

If you are really living life the way it should be lived, this will require mess. As a right-brained sort of person, I firmly believe it necessitates mess. Maybe you have time to always clean it up, but I don't.

Soooooooo. Come to my house. Stop in for a visit. You will find lego creations on flat surfaces, partially done pieces of art tacked to the walls, a child cooking in the kitchen with flour exploding everywhere, laundry piled high in the basement, soccer cleats hung on the door knobs---and that's on a good day!

It's the way my house is and I have FINALLY made peace with it.

5 comments:

Patty Pitcher said...

Way to go!!! One of my favorite quotes is from Mary Ellen Edmunds, "You can write in my dust, just don't date it."

Barb said...

Love this post. Totally agree with you! Also love your blog but then again I love you too so what's not to love!

Unknown said...

Love this one. I hope you realize that you are an amazing lady as well. The main reason I posted that is to make my wife realize how important she is to me. My wife love your blog and agreed with you. Thanks for being you.

Kaylynn said...

I totally agree with your house cleaning philosophy. The other day I thought to myself, I guess I should be glad that I have kids that come home, not be mad that they left their things everywhere. Plus once my mom said that houses aren't supposed to be museums, but factories.

Coralee said...

DJ---no offense intended. I realize your wife IS an amazing person. I guess there are just a lot of times when I feel that I don't measure up to the norm--especially in the homemaking department. But, that is ok. Which is why I had to convince myself of that in this post. For every great wife there is usually an equally great man backing her up on the home front items. I know that is the case with you. Used to be the case with me. I really miss having a husband that LOVED to cook and DIDN'T MIND doing the laundry ; )